I painted the bathroom this weekend.  I hate it.

After all that work, I have looked and studied and contemplated the new shade from various angles, and my gut reaction is the same every time– it’s sort of awful.  The shade of pale blue is the same as the paint swatch I carefully studied against my fixtures only a week ago, but all together, not on a 2″ card, the blue makes all of my tile and my old toilet look horribly dingy and gross.  
Harper Lee loves it and told me it was beautiful, and the color itself is.  It’s bright and light and cheery, and when I look at just part of the wall, I really like it.  It’s when I look at the whole picture that it just really doesn’t work for me.
So now, instead of putting all my mirrors and art back on the walls and buying a bright, pretty bathmat today like I had planned, I am getting ready to head back to Lowe’s for another batch of paint swatches.  Rob says I need to go with a basic tan, and he’s probably right, but my inner artist balks at the thought of tan walls.  “Boo, hiss!” she shouts.  “We want bright colors, something that really smacks you upside the head.”  Isaac voted for red.  That was too much even for me.  I figured light blue would satisfy my craving for color and Rob’s craving for something… subdued.  (The guys has 27 oxford shirts in slightly varying shades of light blue… and no others… so I thought blue would serve us well.)  Now we’re back to the drawing board.
And it’s bumming me out because I love to paint pictures, but I don’t necessarily love to paint walls.  I’m too messy.  I’m not sure the bathroom floor will survive me and another can of paint.  Still, I know that if I don’t like it now, I’ll probably grow to hate it if I don’t just go ahead and redo it.  
This is all sort of funny to me because in addition to painting my bathroom, which had been the same color for nearly nine years, I am also thinking about making some changes in my work.  I have become quite bored lately with both my walls and my work, and I am currently exploring new and exciting options.  I still don’t know exactly what my future holds, but I’m excited about looking at new ways to use my talents and my desire to serve others.  I feel like I’m looking at different paint swatches right now, holding them up to the light and figuring out if they go with my old fixtures.  It’s a little scary– I mean, what if I choose a color and then decide I don’t like it?  Well, I guess I’ll pull out the other swatches and get a new can of paint; in the end, I can throw open the window and enjoy my new clean, much brighter space.
Journal Topic:  What positive changes are you ready to make?
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